Great one liner jokes
WebFunny one-liners 1. Did you hear they arrested the devil? Yeah, they got him on possession. 2. What did one DNA say to the other DNA? “Do these genes make me look … WebAug 29, 2014 · Here are 20 classic one-liners: Woody Allen: “Having sex is like bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.”. Steven Wright: “I think it’s wrong that only ...
Great one liner jokes
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WebOct 22, 2024 · That's what I get for buying a pure bread dog. To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my Word. What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1. I used to run a dating... WebJun 29, 2024 · And that’s just in the hot dogs.”. – David Letterman. “I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.”. – Steve Martin. “I have a lot of growing up to do. I …
1. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. 2. I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any. 3. I failed math so many times at school, I can’t even count. 4. I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke. 5. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, … See more 21. Russian dolls are so full of themselves. 22. The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing someone’s cast. 23. Light travels faster … See more 41. The future, the present, and the past walk into a bar. Things got a little tense. 42. Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. … See more 81. A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of three. He says, ‘Uno, dos…” and poof! He disappeared without a tres. 82. Fighting for peaceis like screwing … See more 61. If attacked by a mob of clowns, go for the juggler. 62. The man who invented Velcro has died. RIP. 63. Despite the high cost of living, it … See more WebAug 21, 2024 · The man stands up, clears his throat, and says 'Plethora.' The wife smiles, and says 'Thank you, that means a lot.'" — BBLTHRW 12 of 24 What a Crappy Situation …
WebSep 29, 2024 · 101 Clean Jokes 1. There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. (… Only a fraction of people will get this clean joke .) 2. What do dentists call their x-rays? Tooth pics! 3.... WebApr 14, 2024 · Clean One Liner Jokes. 91. People tell me I’m condescending. (Leans in real close) That means I talk down to people. 92. “Proof that we don’t understand death is that we give dead people a pillow.”. — Jerry Seinfeld. 93. I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.
WebFamily one liners. About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard. After that, he went down hill fast. 82.65 % / 11581 votes. My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him. 82.62 % / 4183 votes.
WebApr 14, 2024 · Clean One Liner Jokes. 91. People tell me I’m condescending. (Leans in real close) That means I talk down to people. 92. “Proof that we don’t understand death is … teamsters 294WebFeb 17, 2024 · Best Dad Jokes Oliver Rossi // Getty Images What did one plate whisper to the other plate? Dinner is on me. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one. Two sheep walk into a—baaaa. Stop looking for the perfect match; use a lighter. Try the seafood diet—you see food, then you eat it. teamsters 362 calgaryWebApr 3, 2024 · Bill Murray on hope and bacon. "Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die." And for more great comedy jokes from Bill Murray, here are his 30 Most Hilarious Encounters. teamsters 320WebJun 29, 2024 · And that’s just in the hot dogs.”. – David Letterman. “I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.”. – Steve Martin. “I have a lot of growing up to do. I realised that ... teamsters 317WebFeb 22, 2024 · The best jokes are those that don't take so much time to say. Short and sweet. The best one liners are those that say so much with just a simple line. You can get so many people laughing with just these short jokes. 1. Always borrow money from a pessimist. They’ll never expect it back. teamsters 355 baltimoreWebOct 7, 2024 · Moms and dads alike are sure to love these one-liners, smart jokes, and punny jokes. Although knock-knock jokes are classics, sometimes it’s best to skip the … spaceworthyWebFeb 16, 2024 · Funny puns about love. I love you a latte. Take another little pizza my heart now, baby. You're a-maize-ing. I'd run away with you but I cantaloupe. Can I just call you … spacex 401k plan